Thanksgiving has come and gone, we finished the last of our holiday meals tonight. Part of the time I did really well with my food choices, and part of the time I tanked like the Titanic. Weirdly enough, Thanksgiving day, although not perfect, I held up pretty well. It really is a bummer you can't accummulate your carbs and have them when you need them rather than spread out, cause I could do that! It would sooo work for me! Anyway, I ate all my favorite stuff, in reasonable, although I'm sure not reasonable enough, amounts. As I added in my head, I figured I was about 2 carbs over for the day. Not bad. I can live with that for the biggest holiday meal I will have.
Oh but the fun was just starting. A day that shouldn't have tripped me up at all, just threw me for all sorts of curves. The day AFTER Thanksgiving...it was laying in wait for me, I swear! There were all the combinations of things that fit together perfectly to add up to a bad day of food choices for me. First, Caroline and I were alone for the most part, so there wasn't visiting to do or visitors to see and keep occupied with entertaining. Second, neither of us were feeling very well (she had a cold and I was on day 3 of a headache), so we didn't want to get out and go do anything or even really do much around the house. Boredom setting in is so not a good thing for me and food! Since I didn't feel good, I didn't want to cook either, so other than a healthy breakfast (I set out on this day with good intentions!), I left us to nosh on leftovers from Thanksgiving and whatever we could rustle up. Well, you and I both know that if you rustle up something...it's usually the rustling of a chip bag, or the rustling of a wrapper on candy...it's never the rustling of fresh vegetables! Alone, bored, feeling yucky, not cooking...I was doomed when I got out of bed. It didn't help that pecan pie was sitting in my fridge feeling neglected because I only ate one small piece the day before. I could just hear it calling my name...
The only good thing I can say about the day was, it was at least grazing all the wrong foods, and not a big sit down fest of feasting on junk. There were natural consequences, of the kind that I love, love, love to have happen to my children. You know the ones, where you don't have to punish your kids because the outcome of their choice is so awful that they are punished without you having to say a word!? I got just that kind of moment, only it was all mine...every last bite. Ugh. I just thought I felt bad. By the end of the day I was good and miserable, with only myself to thank. At the end of it all, I realized there hadn't even been a vegetable on my horizon, not all day long! That's just nuts.
Which made me think...how often do we just eat, without thought, without effort, without care? We get one body, one shot at taking care of what we've been given, and how often do we expect our bodies to just keep up with what we're doing to it?! As I lay in bed last night, praying...being thankful for my warm house, and my great kids, and memories of happy wonderful holidays from years gone by, I spent a little time talking to the Lord about my choices that day. And I'd love to say there was a bright light moment of knowing I'll never make that mistake again, but who am I kidding? In general, we, as humans aren't nearly as well trained as our pets...we keep sticking our hands to the fire, knowing what happens! But I got up today, with resolve to be thinking about, looking at, aware of what I was eating. Eating with awareness, whether you are diabetic or not, is a real good idea. If you have that down, yay! I don't, I'm still working on it. I'll be working on it when I leave this world, I'm sure. But working on it is better than doing nothing at all.
I refuse to just 'do nothing' about this disease. That would be like standing on the railroad tracks with the train coming and 'hoping for the best'. Uh...NOT. So today was a good day. Even though we had another big dinner with lots of goodies. I ate well all day, and I didn't feel deprived. I felt great actually. And I ate what I wanted at dinner, within reason. As much as anything, this, for me, is a journey about self-control. And never have I had a harder time with anything. I bought a lesson this week though. Hopefully, it will be awhile before I have to buy another.
So for those days when you are losing your mind and eating without using your brain, try a few of these top 25 diabetic snacks from the Diabetes Living online mag. They are good for anyone, you don't need diabetes to enjoy them, I promise! http://www.diabeticlivingonline.com/food-to-eat/nutrition/top-diabetic-snacks/
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